Vulnerable

Talk. Talk. Talk. I can’t go a day without talking to someone. Opening up, sharing stuffs, asking advises,  etc. And I feel too vulnerable these days. Like when I’m happy, I am really too much happy. When I’m sad, I look really depressed. Maybe it’s the way I overthink these days. I don’t know. The only thing I know is, I need someone to talk to.

I wish I have someone to talk to always. You might say family, but no. We were never trained in the family to open up different stuffs to each other. It was kept formal, and everything was plain family stuffs. The first time I had a girlfriend, I wanted to talk about it, but everyone didn’t care. When we broke up, people just shrugged, my mother was happy, for some reason. Maybe because I was too young. But look at me now, a 3rd year college student. And the only person I could talk to at home about anything is my sister. Which sucks by the way because she isn’t even home at most, so I rarely talk to her. So to make up for all of this, I talk to my friends a lot. My bestfriends are always there when I need to talk to them about mostly nonsense. Nonsense means my life. Ha ha. Anyways, that is the only time that I get to show what I feel inside. That’s why I hate going home early, because I will start to hide the stuffs again. When I’m at home I feel alone. Not in a emotional, depressed way. But in a way that I wish I have someone to talk to to burn some time. But that’s not the way it goes.

Well, I’ve nattered too long. Gonna sleep now. Stinson out! :)

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