Nine o’ Five

May 9, 2015

 

Do you remember the last time you made an effort for someone to let them know their worth in this world? When was the last time you scraped your fingers till your bones to show someone everything you wanted them to see. To make them feel the feeling that surges onto your body when you are near them. To give them goosebumps on how much you mean the world to them?

 

Me? I continue to experience it. Better yet, I keep experiencing it. Ever since that year ago that I got my hands tied to everything I know in life and love that I have to show my whole self and what I could and couldn’t do. And I got what I asked for. You know, a year isn’t actually that long. A journey isn’t going to feel so long. If you’re enjoying the ride, you’d most likely ride the wave. And the ride is amazing.

 

She found me. And it will never be as amazing as it is yesterday. Cheers to the future! :)

 

Thank you for accepting me as a whole, my Princess Faye ♥

 

-5:25am. Erick.

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The Person

It’s the person not the feeling. :)

 

Have you ever wondered why there are different kinds of feelings you experience from different kinds of people? It’s because there is just one emotion that could be associated with different people. And the emotions are just there. They never change. What changes are the people around you. The people are unique and different. The attitude, perspective and everything, very different. That’s why the way you experience these emotions different from ever person. You are happiest here, saddest here, comfortable here, etc. And I have the highs and lows to one person only. :)

 

“I look at you every day (well, kinda, weekends siguro pictures haha) And I always see you as another girl. A different girl. A unique girl. Someone who is a cut above the rest. You are nice, cheerful, very mischievous (like me), God-fearing, strong and beautiful. And now I understand why even though there are other girls in the world, and some might be better in other aspects, I still see you differently from them. It’s because you have something they don’t have, and that is my love.”

 

Take care ♥ :)

 

Erick 6:52pm

 

 

Word!

love2

 

It’s kind of straightforward  if you see it clearly with prejudice. Like you’d want to fight for something easier rather than a hard one. But why not fight for the love you believe is worth it? And in turn when the one you are fighting for comes around, you create a new battle, and this time it’ll be you and your partner fighting for the love you’ve found. :) I’d like to think of it that way, even though it hurts every second of my life knowing I’m not even close to what I want to achieve, and I am giving maybe a bit more effort than I thought I could do. But that’s life. You just have to push and never give up.

 

I hope it’s true that you reap twice what you sacrifice on.

 

-Erick. 2:28pm.

Smile

We can never know the impact a simple smile has on another. Smiling is one of the easiest things we can do. Is there a simpler more effortless way to give everyone you meet a moment of joy, even a sense of worth?” – Steve Goodier

 
I came across this quote from a person dear to me and quite frankly, I am compelled. It is exactly how it is described, with just one simple smile, you can turn around the moods of people. They bring a sense of joy, courage, assurance and sometimes, I guess, amusement. But why stop at that? Smiles go a long way down the road. You just need to know where and when you should use it. Nobody is forcing you to smile, but why not? :)

 

The ecstatic feeling of someone smiling at you could be contagious that you, in turn, smile at other people, which will turn into 2 more people smiling, then 4, 8, 16, 32, 64, hundreds, thousands, millions,  all day and night long. Isn’t the world a much nicer place already? I for one believe that a smile, while effortless, could guarantee and assure you in a lot of different and heavy moments and even give you hope on the darkest days. I am appalled on how one person smiles at me and I just think that the world has the nicest people and is the simplest and safest place I could be on. That everything I see is beautiful, everything I hear is music, everything I smell is sweet and everything I feel is elated. It just turns your whole ideas upside down. It gets you out of your comfort zone. But then it gets you scared, scared to see that smile disappear. And then you’d do anything to see that smile again. The one that makes your own world go around. That genuine, beautiful, smile that makes you fall irrevocably and irretrievably in love. It’s hard to forget. I have found that smile, myself, and I will do my utmost best to keep it, just the way it is. :)

 

Distance doesn’t make a difference. They’re just numbers. As long as you’re sincere, it will reach it’s destination.

 

Give someone a smile. It’s never too late. :)

 

-Erick 4:28pm. Jalja~

26th

If you leave me now, you take away the biggest part of me~

 

Kudos, GTA V and Chicago, you really put that song in my head now, Haha. But still, I like that song ever since, but the meaning never got to me that much. Though this time I think it’s different. I am holding something that’s not mine, hoping to be mine, something so priceless, that I am scared to even leave it for a second.

 

Scared of losing someone. Even though I think I may suggest on my mind that I can be found miles away from the start without any contenders, there’s still a thought in my mind that people could catch up and win. I also have the phobia of creating the perfect scenario of a person learning to love herself on my end but realizes all of what I have done is not what she has been looking for. Stumbling, profoundly, waiting for a cure, that I think will never be done anymore. I care, I understand, I love and I long. That’s what I am doing now. And I won’t ever stop, until my bones break, my joints give in or me, when the one tells me purposely to stop my cause or to get the answer I needed, or dreaded. Whichever way it goes, I will take it..

 

*sighs* I am genuinely happy, but I am still genuinely scared.

 

God give me strength.

 

-Erick. 12:32pm.

“Just because I’m not forever by your side doesn’t mean that’s not precisely where I want to be.”

13th

Lately I’ve been, I’ve been losing sleep. Dreaming about the things that we could be..

 

God it’s so hot right now. Summer is like bolting up the meters on Manila’s thermometer it’s making me hard to do anything I need without sweating like a giant fat ass kid. >__< but then again, it’s just a few months away before I get the cold breeze again of Ber-months and my birthday. :))

Hmm, so what did I realize these past days? It might seem like I’ve been working my ass off the few days, but I’m wondering if I really did. But all I can say as of the moment is I’ve found out something about myself that I never knew I could do. From the past time I’ve ever genuinely make an effort, I always come up short on my side and everything just goes haywire. Thankfully though, it happened. Or else I wouldn’t be here talking to the person who holds my heart dearly and I just wish, hope and pray everyday that I would be his knight and shinning armor. I never thought I could exert as much as this effort before based on my lazy personality. If push comes to shove, my impulse acting is like a winning light saber, colored red, depicting, I want to win. I need to win. And it’s really fulfilling to know that your efforts are appreciated. It’s the kind of recognition that would allow you to repeatedly manage every kind of strength you have and build it up to the person and help, protect and even love her in whatever chance you could make or get. And growing like this, I feel like I can do more and more and exert much more effort just to be closer to the person. This is how I am now. And I’m feeling ecstatic about it!

 

Though I may need a bit of rest at the moment. I feel as though I’m awoken and I never want to sleep ever again. Cause if I do, I think I’ll never try this out again. The best feeling in the world is to being contented and loved. That’s what I aim to feel in time. And I hope she too experiences it.

 

Fighting? :)

 

 

-Erick Cua. 5:19pm